A Very Interesting Job Inquiry

What follows is a post I found very interesting. It is a job inquiry written by a High school student.  Her e-mail offers insight to the kind of creative and nuanced thinking that I am always harping about.  It is the kind of writing that get's people noticed.  More than that, in our competitive world, this young woman sets herself apart from everyone else through creativity.

"There is hope for this country after all.

Got an email yesterday from a job seeker, and offer it without comment, except to say that we could not be more impressed, and charmed: 

Hey people!

Have you ever hired someone who ends up being lame and sucks at working? Well I am 100% certain that I have the cure for that! You can hire me, a super awesome, spunky high school student, who can fill any job position, anywhere! Deciding on who to hire for your totally awesome business can be a struggle, so I have been put on this earth to end your suffering! Shall we look at some of my skills hmmm?

Skills: 

1. Super crazy fast typer. I can type and type and type for days! I am not like those other lame people who use two fingers to type, I use all 10 of my fingers to get the job done quickly! 

2. I can answer any phone, day or night, rain or shine! I love being polite to even the meanest people! Mean people don't stand a chance against my niceness. 

3. I have major multitasking skills. I am a woman. We are scary good at multitasking. 

4. I am a woman. 

5. I don't do drugs. That is always a plus. 

6. I am young. Old people don't have the stamina that I do. And college kids are lame and obnoxious. I actually want a job, I am not just getting one because its necessary. So that's basically a sure promise that I will work harder than anyone on this planet. 

7. I am punctual. I have never been late for anything. Ever. If you don't believe me, invite me in for an interview. I will be 5 minutes early. 

8. Unlike most people my age, I am incredibly professional. I know how to work with people. I am a peoples-person. 

9. I have no previous job experience. This means I won't be jaded about having a job. I don't know what having a job feels like so I won't act like I know everything! I am not some snobby teenager that will complain about everything.

10. I am a fast learner and I don't complain. I could be a model or be a dishwasher. Totally doesn't matter! I will always strive to be outstanding in my field. 

Now that you have read my skills you should have a pretty clear idea of what I am capable of doing. Which would be pretty much everything. Now I would type more and tell you my story and all of the places I have volunteered at or the name of my cat, but I am not a time-waster. You should have decided by now that I am pretty much the most capable person for your job and are on your way to hiring the best person for your team. I have no formal training, so you could put my in any type of job and I would be awesome in it! Who needs formal training when you have LIFE training. Call me up for an interview because I really need to save up for a '67 mustang in black or my gap year to Europe. Did I mention I can speak German? I won't disappoint you! 

Thank you for your time, future employer!

— Lindsay"

Note:  I will be posting material like this whenever I come across it because it serves a purpose;  it offers a connection to what some of the finest minds on our planet art thinking.  Moreover, this is a shining example that you don't have to be old, or have a degree to demonstrate your intellectual ability. 

I found this letter on a blog put out by the Uppityshirts, a company that specializes in witty plays on words.  While it is a site that I occasionally visit, I am not promoting the site, and I am not receiving any kind of remuneration for mentioning it here on my blog.  I just think that s an ingenious marketing plan from a small business that celebrates intelligence, that's all.